Life has it's own plans for you, whether you like them or not...!!!


"Everyone secretly thinks they've figured out what their life's gonna be like.
But what no one ever considers is that life has its own plans for you, whether you like them or not.
So don't try to define it totally on your own, better understand the flow and act, or you'll be disappointed."


The last month was pretty tiresome. I was out on different trips in different parts of the country. During the travel time in each trip and during the stay I had interactions with many different types of people. From the stay part, I knew each and everyone beforehand, but never had any opportunity to interact with them intimately. Somehow, I indulged in conversations on different levels with few elders also who never talked to me on the level at which they would have discussed earlier, maybe due to my age (Maybe I've started looking more mature? :D ).

Anyway, whatever the case maybe, Life never stops screwing up with us. If we think that we've handled one situation, another one will come which surely we'd have neglected. If I try to be precise, there are four different fronts in life on which we have to act and manage simultaneously:
  1. Emotional: Comprises of parts from family life to love life.
  2. Intellectual: Portions where we try to satisfy our intellectual needs. Simple example, "Mental Satisfaction during Work".
  3. Financial: Money, how to earn so much, that you can satisfy your needs and responsibilities.
  4. Social: Skip family and love and then everything dealing from relatives to friends to colleagues to etc. etc. etc. will come under it.

Now comes the part where you must be thinking that few things are interrelated. Lets start with 2 at a time.
  1. Emotional + Intellectual: One of the combinations where our life gets messed up because each of them has to be partially compromised. If you choose to work at a place where you're mentally satisfied, then you might end up loosing your loved one. Vice-versa is also applicable.
  2. Financial + Intellectual: Ask anyone working in a big firm, not more than 5% will be satisfied with the work they'll be doing. They are surviving there due to (90% chance) financial reasons as they're being given huge salaries. Now the trend is changing, but still many small companies are there which are doing remarkable work but are yet waiting for some big VC to get funding. If you're stuck there during that time, you're definitely surviving on small bread crumbs to satisfy your intellectual needs.
  3. Emotional + Financial: Stating an easy example of a common Indian man. He wants to go abroad to earn, but family restrictions comes in his ways (obviously a big responsibility).
 ***Social: I'm skipped this one, as humans are becoming inert day by day. No one gives a shit about anyone apart from their first relations and the person with whom they're closely/emotionally associated with.

Okay, Let's take an easy and obvious case of all three main points together.
  • Emotional + Intellectual + Financial: Club all the problems in the above section where we discussed 2 of them at a time. Small example, you get the opportunity, but you are not able to go to that place either due to family or love life. Financial and (maybe) intellectual sacrifice. Another example, your family requires you to earn high. Even you're earning high, but you don't have decent work here. Intellectual sacrifice, it is.
Similarly loads and loads of cases I've seen which puts us in a state of dilemma and we end up sacrificing one or sometimes on two of the fronts of our life.

**********************************************************

Obviously, we can't handle all of them together. There comes the problem that when we start bothering ourselves about these things. But you know what, recently I realized that life's like that only. There's no point bothering about it. It always screws up and plays around with us. This at the end leads us to "quarter-life crisis" when we're young (making us think what we are up to) and at later stage the same situation is called "mid-life crisis"(making us think what we were up to).

I can easily predict the obvious and biggest question that keeps on coming to everyone's mind who has started thinking or relating the things from their life as they are going through this post or have been through any of these situations or phases of compromises during their lifespan, is:

HOW TO AVOID IT?

Well, it can't be avoided. Only the misery can be reduced. Reason is, firstly, we're designed like that by HIM. We'll never be able to stop those thoughts that comes to our mind and they'll always bother us. Believe me, you'll never be satisfied (unless you reach the stage of NIRVANA). Only thing we can do is to think less about it, which is possible only when we keep ourselves busy in different stuff. Again, "stuff" we'll be doing, those obviously come from what targets we set in our lives, right? In short, worry again, as targets not getting fulfilled. So, as my dad told me once and as Britishers have ruled India, "Divide and Rule". So first, have a long term plan, have a vague picture (Why Vague?, Read the first bold and quoted line in the post.) and then divide the vague picture to have short term targets. Okay let's sum it up:
  1. Keep yourselves busy, with short term targets and hobbies.
  2. To set short term targets, first have a vague picture of long term target (Why Vague?, Read the first bold and quoted line in the post)
  3. Divide vague picture into small short term targets. Repeat Step one.
I understand that it's tough to implement everything precisely, but at least we can make some efforts by not loosing our patience, right?

PS: Those who reached till here, I want to add that I'm just a 25 year old guy who hasn't seen much in his life, so might not be the right person to take advice. But I've been through (or in a way still going through) the crisis and have wondered a lot how to figure it out. During the trips I met a person (who played an important part in my life of what I'm right now) after long time and realized he is sort of in his Mid-Life crisis. We had a discussion for couple of hours. This post is majorly from the discussion I had with him and remaining part of it is derived from the person who falls under my emotional front.


Comments

  1. A lot of what you say we know, it is the implementation that takes time..

    Richa

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. I think its not the implementation that takes time, but implementation is the time when we miss these things and get impatient :)

      Delete
  2. Interesting read! Each one of us goes through different phases in our lives, nobody is an exception. Staying positive is the key, best wishes.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Rightly said Leena. Thanks and best wishes to you too.

      Delete
  3. Life is so huge hard to tackle it all in one go.
    Liked your dad's idea of having a long term plan and divide them into smaller targets.

    ReplyDelete
  4. LIFE is funny paaji.. what we need to do is instead of trying ot change it all the time , we need to just face it always and take it on as it comes ..

    that was a good discussion ...

    How are you doing and I dont think AGE matters in what a person has experienced .. it is what we learn from those experiences that makes us what we are ..

    Bikram's

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks Bhaaji... :)
      Life is good. Sometimes it keeps me busy, sometimes I keep it busy.

      Delete

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